A love triangle is a situation where two people are both in a romantic relationship with the same person. It can also happen when someone in a romantic relationship is also involved with another person. A love triangle is not the same as when one person loves another, who loves a third, and so on.

Love triangles are often used in stories, plays, and movies. In Western countries, many adults have been part of a love triangle, whether they wanted to be or not.

The 1994 book Beliefs, Reasoning, and Decision Making states, "Although the romantic love triangle is the same as a friendship group, their effects are different because romantic love is usually exclusive, unlike friendships."

History and definition

The term "love triangle" usually refers to a situation that is not good for one or more people involved. One person often feels betrayed at some point, for example, "Person A is jealous of Person C, who is in a relationship with Person B, who Person A considers 'their person.'" A similar situation where all people agree to it is sometimes called a "triad," which is a type of polyamory. However, polyamory usually includes sexual relationships. In the context of monogamy, love triangles are hard to keep stable, and unrequited love and jealousy are common. In most cases, the jealous or rejected person ends a friendship—and sometimes starts a fight—with the other person over the third person they are interested in. Though rare, love triangles have sometimes led to murder or suicide by the person who feels rejected.

Psychoanalysis has studied "the theme of love triangles and their connection to the Oedipal triangle." Experience shows that "a pattern of repeatedly being involved in love triangles can often be resolved by examining how a person relates to each parent and both parents as a couple during childhood." In these cases, "men who are only interested in married women but cannot handle a serious relationship if it becomes more than an affair often rely on the husband to protect them from a real relationship…as women who repeatedly get involved with married men depend on the wives."

Common themes

In geometry, the eternal triangle can be shown as three points: a jealous person (A) in a relationship with someone who is unfaithful (B), who has another partner (C). Person A feels left out, person B is caught between two people, and person C causes problems in the relationship between A and B.

Some people say that when men share a sense of brotherhood and include a woman in their relationship, an isosceles triangle forms, as seen in the film Jules et Jim by Truffaut. René Girard studied how envy and imitation of desires affect relationships, explaining that often, a desired object or person becomes controlled by the person who has a special connection to it. In these cases, it is unfair to blame a woman for conflicts between two people who are competing for the same thing. Instead, she becomes a shared target of blame.

When a love triangle causes a marriage to end, it may lead to a rule called the "defilement taboo." This rule is created by a jealous former partner, who demands that the other person avoid any friendly or supportive contact with the person they were competing with. This often causes children to feel troubled by past events, as they may take sides and struggle with their loyalties. Usually, the person who feels hurt in the relationship may influence the children to reject the new relationship.

Regarding gender roles, evidence suggests that in modern times, both men and women can equally be the "other person" in a love triangle. Men and women can experience love with the same intensity and make similar mistakes. There is no proof that men are better at controlling their emotions in such situations than women. Traditionally, women are often the center of a love triangle involving rivalry, while men are more likely to be the center in a love triangle involving a split relationship. This is because polygyny (a man having multiple wives) is more common than polyandry (a woman having multiple husbands).

A love triangle should not be confused with a ménage à trois, which is a three-person relationship where all individuals are romantically involved with each other, or one person has relationships with two others who accept the situation instead of being in conflict. The term ménage à trois is French and means "household for three," typically referring to a married couple and a lover who live together and share sexual relationships. This differs from a love triangle because all participants in a ménage à trois are equally driven by sexual desires. A ménage à trois is a type of "sandwich" relationship, which can involve any combination of genders, such as three men, three women, two men and one woman (ménage à trois), or two women and one man (the Tourist Sandwich).

In entertainment

Love triangles are a common theme in entertainment, especially in romantic stories. They appear in opera, romance novels, soap operas, romantic comedies, manga, tabloid talk shows, and popular music. They are also a major part of Indian television shows.

Three of the highest-grossing movies in history, when considering changes in money value over time, are romantic stories that include a love triangle. These movies are Gone with the Wind, Titanic, and Doctor Zhivago. Books for teenagers often use the love triangle story pattern, as seen in Twilight or The Selection. However, this story structure has existed for a long time, even before classic writers like William Shakespeare and Alexandre Dumas. In Shakespeare’s play Romeo and Juliet, a love triangle involves Juliet, Romeo, and Paris. In Dumas’s works, such as The Count of Monte Cristo and The Three Musketeers, love triangles also play a key role in driving characters to seek revenge or start wars.

In 1865, Bengali writer Bankim Chandra Chattopadhyay wrote a novel called Durgeshnandini, which includes a love triangle among Jagat Singh (a Mughal General), Tilottama (the daughter of a Bengali feudal lord), and Ayesha (the daughter of a rebel Pathan leader who was fighting Jagat Singh).

On television shows, love triangles often last a long time, making it difficult for characters to finally declare their love. This can cause conflicts or disappoint fans. Love triangles are especially common in soap operas and can continue for many years. For example, in The Bold and the Beautiful, characters Taylor Hamilton, Ridge Forrester, and Brooke Logan are involved in a long-lasting love triangle. Similarly, in General Hospital, a love triangle involves Luke Spencer, Laura Spencer, and Scotty Baldwin.