Financial infidelity is a type of money problem where someone hides or lies about money matters from a romantic partner. How couples handle money, including financial infidelity, can affect how happy and stable their relationship is. In a 2018 study, 27% of people said they kept a financial secret from their partner at some time, and 53% said they did things that would be considered financial infidelity. Examples of financial infidelity include lying about spending money, hiding a gambling issue, keeping a secret savings account, and not telling a partner about debt.
Causes
A connection between financial infidelity and how couples handle money has been studied. Researchers named Jeanfreu and others discovered that couples who had a clear plan for managing money, such as dividing responsibilities or having regular meetings about finances, were less likely to experience financial infidelity compared to couples without such a plan. Other researchers have suggested that some people may not realize their actions are considered financial infidelity or believe the dishonesty is too small to matter.
According to the 2021 Harris Poll, reasons for financial infidelity included wanting to keep financial matters private (38% of people surveyed), feeling embarrassed or afraid (33% of people surveyed), and disapproval from a partner (61% of people surveyed). Researchers named Canale and others have suggested that differences in how men and women view money, such as focusing on competition rather than teamwork, may lead to financial infidelity. Other reasons include hiding marital affairs, protecting oneself, or planning to leave a relationship. Jeanfreu and others found that the two most common reasons for financial infidelity were avoiding conflicts and spending money on personal needs.
Effects
A study by Jeanfreu and others found that people who experienced financial infidelity had lower life satisfaction and lower happiness in their marriages compared to those who did not. According to the 2021 Harris Poll, financial infidelity had different effects on relationships. Nineteen percent of people reported that their romantic relationship improved after the experience, while sixteen percent said they got divorced and thirteen percent said they separated. When financial infidelity occurs in a relationship that ends, trust problems can affect future romantic relationships.
Theories and interventions
Research and therapy focused on family financial problems is a newer area of study that uses different ideas to guide how it works. The Couples and Finance Theory (CFT) is a set of ideas used in financial planning research and therapy. It explains that how couples handle money and how couples interact are connected in a way that improving one area can help improve the other. Social exchange theory, which describes how romantic partners make financial decisions by considering what they gain or lose in a relationship, was used to create a tool to measure financial transparency, which is the opposite of financial infidelity. One example of a treatment for financial infidelity is the Klontz and Klontz (2009) SAFE intervention. Other treatments often come from marriage and family therapy. Financial infidelity has been measured using the following tools:
- 2021 National Endowment for Financial Education Harris Poll
- The Financial Transparency Scale
- The Financial Infidelity Scale